Forever Fondness

Okay. Sometimes life can be stressful. Like...starting a new job and having to learn every single little detail........and your brain can't remember anything because it's on overload and all you want to do is a great job. And maybe there is a huge sale on your first weekend. And you have a million questions and want to quit when people stare at you like you're an idiot. You get home and have nothing to do...so you sit and watch Netflix for hours...and you start to wonder why you are where you are. "Why don't I have a passion? Why don't I have something to do other than watch Netflix? Why am I sitting in an empty house when there is a whole world out there?" A large sadness might start to fill your mind. BUT THEN. Then...something amazing happens. Life throws a happy curve ball at you. A happy curve like...you had the best day at work and were successful solo! A happy curve ball like the I-haven't-seen-my-best-friend-sister-second-family-and-have-the-chance ball. A happy curve ball like the something good is coming. Happiness is coming. I can see it. I can feel it. That little light at the end of the tunnel. This isn't just because I'm about to see my best friend, but because something good and happy happened. It creates hope in all other areas in my life.Where is my pickaxe cause I'm too excited to sleep?! I want to destroy the rocks blocking that light. I'm hopeful, I'm excited, and I'm impatient. Thank God for something exciting to keep my heart warm right now. I'm thankful. Here's to you, life! 

xo

You Don't Have a Fast Car

As I sit in my aunt’s cozy house-turned-to-my-home, staring up at the ceiling while sprawled out on the comfy white carpet...I can’t help but wonder what exactly it is I’m doing with my life. Don’t get me wrong, I love having the comforts of a nice house and family that will take me in when I need it most. But, somehow in the comfort of love I have a sickening impatience for finding myself and being productive. I mean, I guess that's a good thing. So, here’s to resurfacing my love for writing! My first blog post in a long while comes from the feeling of being washed up after graduating college. There’s hope, but until I find my path I’ll listen to my morning tunes and drink my cup of joe. This morning, though, I had a different experience. Have you ever heard a song that reached your heart in a can’t-stop-shivering kind of way? It’s not so often that these types of songs come around, but recently I heard Tracy Chapman’s Fast Car (wait, you just heard that now?!...I know). Something gripped my heart in a way that I can’t really describe, but I can tell you that it made me realize that as a Twenty-something-unemployed-girl...I want to feel like I belong. “and I had a feeling that I belonged, I had a feeling I could be someone.” You got that right, Tracy. I have a feeling I can be someone, but right now I just can’t seem to see through the fog that is unemployment *sigh*... “You’ve got a fast car, is it fast enough so you can fly away? You’ve gotta make a decision...leave tonight or live and die this way.” Well, I sure won’t be living this way forever... AKA with my aunt whilst wishing I had money enough to buy a car and drive myself to my wish-i-had-a-part-time gig <<since my legs aren’t fast enough to leave tonight and fly away>>. But (oh, the almighty but), “leaving tonight” didn’t work so well for me. As I shipped off to Boston to interview for a job and be near the guy I love, I realized that planning and organization is important……...okay and maybe having money first, too. Back to Minnesota in a months time, I understood the meaning of the overused term “the real world.” So, while I dream big dreams and read my romance novels, I’ll save up and wait patiently to make something of myself. To belong. So, shout out to any twenty-somethings that come across this blog and feel like our college careers were a waste because we’re unemployed. Our time will come, our niche will be found, and we’ll lead happy lives. Until then, let’s continue tipping back our hazelnut coffee, reading Nora Roberts, and dreaming the biggest of dreams. Cheers!

p.s. another shout out to my college bestie, cause she just landed her first big girl gig today! *light at the end of the dark dark DARRRRRK tunnel of job searches*